Divorceworkshop Blog
Transactional Coparenting: A Practical Path Forward
The complexities of coparenting necessitate a range of styles which means that coparenting dynamics are as varied as the parents themselves. While each circumstance is unique, a few common strategies emerge. These strategies hinge on an essential characteristic of coparenting - the level of cooperation parents can effectively manage. These strategies significantly impact how people who are parenting from separate homes interact and function.
This article explores one such approach: transactional coparenting. This method prioritizes practicality and logistics over connection and mutual support. An understanding of the characteristics of transactional coparenting can help equip coparents with tools to establish a functional routine and effective relationship amidst the disruption of separation.
The Cost of Divorce: Budgeting and Planning for Expenses
Divorce can be a costly process, but with careful budgeting and strategic planning, you can manage expenses and protect your financial future. In this blog post, we explore ways to budget effectively, reduce costs during a divorce, and explain how a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) can be a valuable resource.
How did the Narcissist become this way?
Understanding the twists and turns of human behavior is just part of life's journey. Sometimes, we come across behaviors in others that puzzle us.. However, when these traits lean towards the spectrum of narcissism, the challenge becomes notably formidable, especially within the context of past relationships with partners or spouses. Recognizing the presence of narcissistic tendencies in a partner can occur gradually, characterized by patterns of blame, projection, deception, gaslighting, manipulation, etc.
In my journey, these realizations began to unfold in my late 30s, as I started to discern recurring behaviors within my marriage. While the decision to extricate myself from this toxic dynamic was arduous, it ultimately proved to be liberating. Yet, even after severing ties, lingering questions persisted—how does one evolve into becoming a person high on the narcissism spectrum? What are the influences that shape such behavior?
Grey Divorce and the Effects on your Children
What struck me in that conversation was the assumption that once kids grow up, we often think our children are somehow shielded from the impact of divorce. The reality is, that divorce is a significant event with lasting effects that extend beyond just the younger ones in the family. Recent statistics reveal that 16.4% of divorces involve marriages of 25 years or more, and 42% occur in marriages lasting between 10 and 24 years. While it's acknowledged that divorce does affect children, especially in high-conflict situations, the idea that young adults come out unscathed is incorrect. Challenges and grief persist, emphasizing the need for a thorough understanding of the impact of divorce on individuals of all ages
High-Conflict Divorce: Co-Parenting vs. Parallel Parenting
It's crucial to clarify that the terms "co-parenting" and "parallel parenting" are not legal terms; instead, they are practical strategies designed to help divorced parents navigate the complexities of raising children separately. These strategies emphasize the importance of prioritizing the well-being of the children during and after divorce proceedings, providing a framework for effective parenting collaboration despite any lingering personal conflicts. The parents themselves decide that parallel parenting is right for them or with help from legal representatives. The best parallel parenting arrangement begins with clear rules and expectations established from the beginning. Since minimal contact between parents is a key aim, creating detailed parallel parenting plans covering various future scenarios is usually beneficial.
My Best Friend is divorcing. Should I get one too?
Have you ever had a conversation with a dear married friend about your divorce, only to notice them growing visibly uncomfortable as if the topic itself were taboo or made them uncomfortable? I distinctly recall such moments, not only with one friend but with several within my social network. Looking back, it was as if I had unwittingly contracted some contagious ailment, leaving them hesitant to engage in an in-depth discussion about my divorce. Little did I know that years later, I would stumble upon a captivating study from Brown University that sheds light on this very phenomenon.
Broken Bonds: Navigating Parental Alienation - One Father's Tale
Little did I know that the true challenges lay ahead and the post-divorce abuse that was to come, as I encountered the grief-ridden experience of being alienated from my youngest son. As the first year passed after the separation, the signs of parental alienation became increasingly evident. My youngest son's withdrawal and abrupt silence shattered me, as our once-strong bond disintegrated before my eyes. It felt like an invisible barrier had been erected, leaving me adrift and ill-equipped to navigate this challenging situation. Confusion consumed me as I struggled to understand the reasons behind his sudden withdrawal and how to respond. This experience caught me off guard, and I was completely unaware and unprepared for this type of thing. Sadly, I had no idea that this could actually happen, and tragically, it is more common than I initially recognized
The Resilience of Love: Embracing Remarriage After Divorce
As human beings, we are wired for attachment, including romantic love. So, when I recently came across statistics revealing that many individuals tend to remarry after divorce, I wasn't entirely surprised.
While we are well aware of the high divorce rates for second and third marriages, it seems that this doesn't deter a significant number of women (52%) and men (64%) from taking that leap of faith once again. This newfound understanding was intriguing, as it shed light on the unwavering belief in the institution of marriage, even after experiencing the challenges of divorce.